Unbearable ..

Hello friends, it has been such a crazy chaotic week .. too many things happened, when I look back at my week I say "oh god I went through all of that?!!!!"
this week I was so busy with school, I had so much homework, also there were problems in school with a teacher, we want to have a different Arabic teacher, we have such a great teacher in school who taught the 6th grade for over than 28 years, and we want her to teach us this year instead of the teacher we have now who explains in a wrong way !!! .
beside being busy with school, and homework, this week was really bad, the situation became unbearable, the terrorists killed many Christians, and bombed their houses for no reason but trying to separate us from each other (which won't happen, our hearts are with the Christians in Mosul, we are praying for them continuously), many families left their city, and went to country side, I am so worried about all Christians I know, my neighbors, teachers, and friends, my best friend in the whole world is Christian, I don't know what will happen to me if terrorists hurts her or her family, I hope she'll remain safe, I pray for her and all Iraqis every single day..
I can't imagine that my neighbors, friends, and teachers who taught me for years, in kindergarten, primary and secondary were forced to leave and that they are living in the villages or churches, I heard that my favorite teacher is living in the tent, with her family and kids who left school, such a respectful loving and caring woman who taught generations for over than 30 years shouldn't live in a tent and be treated this way, nor the other Christians ..
What the hell the government is waiting for? 2000 families left Mosul last week, the terrorists are everywhere killing and threatening innocent Iraqis who belong to different religions and casts,.. we want a solution and we want it NOW ..
Few days ago, I came home tired from everything going on, the situation and school, I decided to take a nap before studying, I was falling asleep when something happened and I wasn't sure what was it at that time, my mom (half asleep) caught me from my arm and shouted without thinking "go to the kitchen" (she thought my brother was there) both of us ran to the kitchen but my brother wasn't there, she said "no run downstairs, to your brother" he was shouting and crying "mammy" I ran (half asleep) shoeless I was walking over things, dust and thick dark smoke filled the whole house (and still I didn't realize what happened!!), when I reached the last step in the stairs, I saw the living room in such horrible situation and damaged , just then my brain started working again and I realized it was big and close explosion ! I carried my brother who was shaking, shouting loud and standing in the corridor, then I felt that my legs failed me and I sat on the floor feeling dizzy trying to understand what had happened.
I heard my neighbors shouting and running in the street, my grandpa went out side to see what happened and heavy shooting started, grandpa (without thinking) drag my neighbor from his arm to avoid the gun-shots .. at that time my neighbor was in his way to his brothers' empty house to check it and see if it was damaged in a previous explosion happened earlier (my neighbor was threatened ,and left iraq with his family).
After few minutes another explosion happened, with tears on my brother's check he looked at me and said " you are a liar you said there won't be explosions any more" I couldn't answer, but I hugged him..
There were a lot of noise and shouts in the neighborhood, not everyone was lucky like my family and I, people died and others injured, one of my neighbors who is a new bride was injured badly in her face and neck, why should such a beautiful young lady live with scars in her face?? Oh god, your mercy, when will we have a peaceful life? I want to stop worrying and start living .. I missed school for one day, I stayed to help fixing the house, my brother went to grandpa while he was talking the man who'll make new windows for us and said "TELL HIM TO BRING BETTER WINDOWS THIS TIME SO THAT WHEN EXPLOSIONS HAPPEN NEXT TIME THEY DON'T BRAKE ,OK? my grandpa who's 70 years old cleaning and fixing the house
my grandma who's 63 years old cleaning ..
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This week I had my eyes examined , I went with grandpa , dad and sister (my vision is good, and I am still making exercises), anyway, we were walking when grandpa's friend stop us to say hi .. I was looking around and a strange thing caught my sight..
There were about 6 or 7 men standing in the corner selling books, they frightened me so much, the way they looked and their clothes style made me suspicious, the only thing that came to my mind was "terrorists" because why would 7 men sell few books? One man could do it !! beside I can tell from the way they looked (and god knows, maybe they are good but I don't think so :D), I didn't give attention and turned to grandpa's friend who asked me about my news .. but the whole time I kept praying nothing bad will happen and my grandpa's friend leave us so that we leave quickly, my dad, sister , grandpa, and his friend were talking and laughing and didn't notice those men's' presence. my sister was standing behind me she saw a cute baby and was waving to him so that he pay her attention! I drag her from her arm and asked her to stay between me and dad, because one of those men was looking at me and my sister with scorn and humiliation, he was looking deep into my eyes with a killing evil look made me terrified, his eyes were red, I'll never forget the feeling I felt at that time, I was praying I wont be kidnapped ..
It upsets me to see such people walking in our streets while the politicians are too busy to work seriously and provide security .
I hope things will get better I pray for that every single day from the bottom of my heart …
Sunshine .
P.s the explosion was only 50 meters away from our house !!!