Ana Ka'aba .....

Merry Christmas and Happy New year , I wish you all the happiness and I hope this year will be better , safer , and peaceful one ..
This year , was really tough for me ,I hope in 2007 we will live in a free country , with out shooting and explosions ( although I am saying that , and I don't think that I will ever live in peace).




*******************
I was reading my previous posts and I realized how unoptimistic and depressed person I become , many of my posts start with " it was tough week " " it was a horrible day " and so on .
But I really don't have good news to tell !
it was really bad week for me , I feel like something inside me will explode, I try to hold my tears all the time I feel so bothered from life , house , school , exams , and everything , the problems never ends . I hear the people's problems but I'd never say mine , because first I don't want to bother the others , and second all of the people I know have so many problems in their lives , so they definitely don't want to hear more !.
my marks are not bad ,I get the highest marks in English , mathematics, biology, religion .. I'd never take a mark lower than 90 in them , my par in mathematics is 99.4 % , and religion 100 % , but I still don't know my exact par in English and bio.
***************************
I hear at least five or six explosions every evening while I am studying ….
They are loud , they scare my brother very badly , and that caused a problem in his pronunciation , he repeats every word many times before pronouncing the other , I am really worried about him, there aren't any good doctors , the good doctors left Iraq...
***************
I think I didn't tell you about R's computer , we bought it and I brought it to school , it was gorgeous , I asked the English teacher to allow us to take R during the lesson for few minutes to the headmistress's room ,and she agreed ( I have wonderful English teacher , although she said once" I will examine everyone postpone an exam from the beginning of the book " I was really worried that the bridges might be locked, or something happen ) .
Anyway R was completely shocked when she saw the computer , and we also took many pics and a video .
She's learning how to use the computer , and teaching her family .
She still have so many problems in her life , and I keep talking to her , not to listen to her aunts ( her dad's sisters ) who are mean to her .















***************
You remember my last post about my neighbor who was injured and how bad I did in the geography exam , I took 87 , but the teacher will cancel that one , and I will have another exam on Sunday , I am really worried , she will bring me very hard questions
First I thought she liked me , but now I don't think so, she doesn't treat us well, and make us feel very little .
The chemistry teacher hate me , once she said " who didn't understand this subject " and I said " I didn't ma'am " , she said angrily " WHY , HA ? WHY ? WHAT I WAS DOING , WASN’T I EXPLAINING ? " !!!!!!
While some girls get her attention , she even tell them while she is examining us " this question is wrong " or watch that " , not only the chemistry teacher , many others , it is unfair ..
16 girls from Baghdad came to attend my school. , they had to leave their houses because of the unsecured situation , and some left without taking anything with them , the terrorists brandished them , one of them lost her brother and father , we made donations for them , and allocated 480000 ID, blankets , and new clothes , so I was really busy this week….
**************************
Eid Al athha will be on 31\12 , but I don't feel the Eid's spirit .

Sunshine .

It couldn’t happen to you ...........

Hello , what is the meaning of " BAD DAY" ?
Yesterday " Thursday " I had a very bad day , I was in the garage , waiting for the driver , when my neighbor " H" , came to say hello , he was standing near me , and talking with my grandma, suddenly he touched his leg and said " awwwwwwwch " , my grandma thought that he had a muscle spasm , or something like that , but I realized it was more then that , he shouted "it is a bullet" .
A bullet entered his leg, he fell down on the floor , my grandma went inside the house to call his family , no one was in the street , I got panicked and started to cry and shake hysterically, I ran and brought handkerchiefs , and started to put them on his leg , he was bleeding , the driver came to drive me to school , I told him to wait , I put my bag in the car and ran back to my injured neighbor , I went to bring my mom I was out of breath , and couldn't talk , I was terrified " I was , a man , a bullet , the car , blood , neighbor , bandage , cotton, come please " I couldn't create a sentence , she didn't understand me but she came and brought medical cotton and bandage with her , she ran wearing her pajamas ! anyway she tied his leg so hard , to stop the bleeding , and I kept crying shaking and spreading so many handkerchiefs on the floor to cover the blood, I don’t know why !.
Then his wife , kids , brothers , sisters , cousins , and nephews came running toward our house , and one of his relatives took him to the hospital by his car , I went to school , and kept crying all the way long , and when I reached there , I was shaking so badly, even the teachers were worried about me , my mom called the headmistress and told her what happened , when I arrived school the headmistress asked me to sit in her room, the teachers were around me , trying to calm me down , after an hour I stopped shaking , but kept crying , I missed 2 classes and did so bad in geography exam , I wrote " the running winds" , and I did very silly mistakes ..
"R" my dearest friend came while I was in the headmistress room ,she was crying and shaking too , a mine exploded in front of their car , !!!! the car's windows were broken , then US soldiers started to shoot their car !.
Then our friend "Sh" came crying , because she heard about me and "R" .
Then our teacher Mrs. E came to the headmistress with tears in her eyes because her aunt died .
Then Mrs. S she is another teacher came and said quickly " excuse me , I have to go , 3 of my neighbors were killed "
At last Mrs. "A" came and said "did you know about the Arabic teacher , her nephew was killed" .
Suddenly the headmistress fell down , we ran to her desk to see what happened , she fainted because of all what was going on in her room ,as well as she was tired from taking care of her sick mother ,and from being awake all the night.
so many events , and so many bad news …
After I calmed down I went to the class , I was trying to understand what happened , I was hoping that it is just a nightmare , but unfortunately it was true , horrible but true , this is my life.
No one should go through that , but what can I do except praying and hoping that we will remain alive .
I've seen so many views in TV., In movies and news channels , but is different and scary too see that on real..
My life is turning from worse to worst .
And the situation here is not good , and my way to school is horrible , I feel like I travel to school everyday, it is far , and the bridges are always locked and there are mines in them , sometimes bombing cars , I spend about 40 minutes in my way to school , and an hour or more in my way to the house .
Sunshine .
I read all of the E-mails I got in the last few weeks , but I couldn't answer them because I didn't have electricity nor time , I will do that ASAP.

A friend in need is a friend indeed ......

Hello friends , how are you ?
I've been busy with exams and homework this week , we didn't have electricity all most at all , I used to study on the torch's light . in addition it is so cold in Mosul now , and we don't have fuel for the subas ( kind of heaters work on fuel) , it is really nice conditions to study , dark , cold with sounds of shooting and explosions , and as my room has large windows , I sometime can't study in it , whenever shooting began I ran from room and hide in the corridor .
As well as I was trying to help a child with heart problem and send him abroad , and contacting organizations for Mohamed , collecting money for R's computer ,in fact it was a week for doing good things.

In this week , I decided to collect money to buy a computer for R , (my best friend who lost her dad as well as 6 relatives ), and I collected so good amount of money , I can't wait till I see her impressions when I will bring the computer to school , I think it is really nice present . when I told my friends about my idea , they said " you are crazy" , " we can't collect money for a computer " ! 17 girls participated and now we have more than four hundred fifty (450000 ID) , I had no idea that I will collect that quantity I am so happy , R will be too happy ..
My mom , grandma , and grandpa very much liked the idea , and they are supporting me , by efforts and money .

B , who I considered her as a faithful friend , went to the girls to convince them not to participate " that is ridiculous, useless, and you are wasting your money on something silly like that ? " those were her words .. I don't know why she is doing that , when I decided to help Mohamed and the 5 years old boy with heart problem she said " you are stupid , do something useful" , is there any thing useful more then saving people's lives? .
I teach R how to use computer twice a week ( we have old computers in school ) . she feel comfortable to talk to me , because she's sure that I will not tell any one about her problems, when I reach home I burst with tears , she is living in such hard circumstances, and her financial condition is really bad , I try to help her in simple things , like buy her stuff she needs , or in any possible way I can do , like in computer lesson , the teacher wanted us to create a computer program , she said "if you don't know you will have to go to a programmer and pay for him, but that will cost a lot " creating a program costs about 175000ID that is a LOT OF MONEY , Anariki and the kid helped me making the program and I added R's name next to mine in this project , as well as S my other best friend .
the computer teacher is so mean with R , she say " why don't you have computer ? ","are you illiterates ?"," only people who are …. You know don't have computers"" she means poor people , or" are you still illiterates" , " everyone have computers in their houses ? " can you believe that anyone in this world can say such things to a poor orphan ? I went to another teacher and told her , R really get hurt from the teacher's word , not all of the people in the world are rich and have computers .
Anyway I told R that I bought her a computer ( I didn’t until now , but I told her I did ,so that she can't refuse taking the present, pride issues again) , she refused first , but I convinced her hardly and told her that my relatives sell computes and they didn’t take so much money from me , ( she believed that , heheheh ) I don't lie , but I had to this time . she's extremely happy, but she still have doubts that we might be kidding or it's just a jock , but she will be sure that I am serious when the computer will be in her bedroom .
I told her because the girls condition was to tell R first , and if she agree they will bring the money ..
R's dad bought them a computer desk , and a chair before he died , he was planning to buy the computer on Sunday , but unfortunately he was killed on Thursday .

I contacted more organizations for Mohamed , but I didn't get a reply until now.
I knew about a child names Mohamed Gasim Mohamed , with a heart problem , i have his medical report and will contact the organizations , I hope they can send him abroad .
*****************************************
I did so bad in two chemistry exams , and I kept crying all the day after the second exam, not just me who did bad , most of the girls , it was a horrible day , I hate chemistry and it's teacher .
The questions in all the exams were really difficult.
I got a perfect mark in mathematics 50 out of 50 .
The Arabic teacher is teaching us a book not from the curriculum, this book called " Aqeel" and the people in university study it ( 4th class Arabic literature ) , I found it hard , but it is a new policy in school , more information and harder questions !
A week a go , while I was in school I heard shooting and explosions( it is normal , we hear shootings and explosions everyday ) , my friend's house is near the school , when she reached home , she didn't find her parents , her mom was injured badly and went to the hospital , the shrapnel harmed her mom's leg , the injury was deep and reached her vein.
She is ok now ..
I also collected money for paupers ,one of my teachers knew some poor people that needs money , and she asked us if we can help , I told her that I will . the girls brought good cash, my grandma made a bag for me , so that I put the money in .
Sunshine ..


Btw , I apologize to my friends who added me to skype when I formatted my computer I lost all of your address.. and I can't remember them.

Eid's spirit......

Hello friends ,
Eid was a week ago, this Eid wasn't like before , I didn't feel it's spirit ,we visited only 5 families !! and no one entered my house except one neighbor !! while before we used to visit many families during the Eid days , we used to have fun and laugh, and see a smile on everyone's face , but this Eid everyone was talking about policy, fuel , electricity , kidnapping , killing accidents , and other horrible subjects ! they were talking about our life (our reality) which is not fun at all .
We had a family meeting on the first day were we had lunch there , and then we went to my parents' eldest uncle , there was another family meeting , but I didn't see all the family members , they left early before we had arrived ( as you know the bridges can be locked at every sec) , I didn't see some of my relatives for over a year , in the next day we visited my dad's uncle , he had a surgery and was still lying in his bed. then we visited his other uncle. at night our neighbors visited us( the one who was kidnapped awhile ago) , in the next day we visited our friend's house , Dr. E and his family , while we were there we heard a nearby explosion and shooting .
I was really busy that's why I couldn't write to you , I had my monthly exams ( biology , English , chemistry , physics , history , and geography ) , I did well .
The chemistry exam was so hard , the teacher said that she brought us hard questions , to see how intelligent we are ! many of the girls cried after the exam because the didn't know how to answer , anyway , I was really worried , I didn't know whether my answers were right or not , but thank god , I was one from few girls who answered the questions correctly .
We had two biology exams , in the first exam I did really good , and I was expecting a full mark , but I got 90% , I had only one mistake , I deserve higher mark , but very few girls got nineties marks, many got eighties, seventies , even sixties , the teacher gave us low marks so that we study harder , that's what she said
The geography and history teacher will not teach us anymore , because she will study to get the MSc degree , another teacher will teach us , I feel terrified when I see her , she taught me in the first and second class.
This year in English , we should make a summary after every paragraph we take , and every chapter of the novel" kipps", I usually don't use the words written in the book , I try to use their synonyms to make the teacher amazed , she always asks me" from where did you learn such terms ?..
A new girl came to my class , we became friends immediately , we have the same interests , the same opinions , and she is sooooo sweet , I am really happy, we became really close , and we sit in the same desk , she also like to help the others .
Live strong,
Sunshine ..
Btw , the answers I got from many organizations " it is too late for the boy " or " there is no chance for curing " but I will keep searching, because I believe that it is never too late , and I will never ever give up, I would like to thank my friends who helped and supported me , wayne , for what it worth, kim , nabil , najma , david , madcanuck , miraj , olive branch , grayday101 , Original_Jeff , and I am missing many friends they are so many to mention , thank you all for your support and kind words , I love you all.

From the middle of the events ...

On Thursday, terrorists attacked the police station behind my house , it was a horrible day ..
I couldn't sleep well at the night before because of bad flu, I woke up at 7 am , while I was still in my bed I heard VERY loud explosion but it seemed to be far away from my neighborhood. I left bed and went to the living room ,at 7:30 while my mom was preparing to go to work we heard many explosions with heavy shooting just behind our house , my brother ( two years and half) ran from his room , shouting , crying , and shaking " MAMMY , NO,MAMMY " , he was sleepy , my sister was also asleep she left her room crawling , we hide in my grandparents' guest room , my grandpa was in his work , as soon as he reached there, two vehicles exploded near al-mosul university , we were very worried about him. he saw the whole thing . in that horrible explosion 25 were killed and 38 were badly injured ,all were from Iraqi citizens.



many rockets fall on my neighborhood and in other regions that day , 19 innocents died , thank god my family and I are ok .. the phone didn't stop ringing all day long, our relatives and friends were checking us..
I called my friend" B" , she said that at 7:30 am , the police station near her house was attacked by terrorists too , a nearby neighborhood noticed a battle also, so I think the situation is horrible in Musol as a whole…
There is a curfew , and it will last for some time, I guess..
Last week , the terrorists wanted to occupy mosul , but they failed. They will NEVER win ..
It was a tough week for me , in every day I spend at least an hour trying to find an open way to go to school , it has been a month since I started school , and until now , I didn't go to school easily.
I saw a video in Nineveh TV .in which a brave Iraqi policeman suspected in a driver driving his car speedy and coming toward the police station , he shot the driver before reaching the police station , but unfortunately the car exploded , to kill the brave policeman , who saved many souls, I was very touched by this video, god bless the policeman soul..
Oh , I heard so many tragic news this week !!!.
*************************
I very much appreciate your concern about Mohamed, his family doesn't want money, they just want an organization can send their child to a good hospital , Mohamed is very sick , and he is getting worse, so please hurry up..
**************
Eid will be on Sunday or Monday , I wish from the bottom of my heart that we will not have a curfew , and I will enjoy Eid .I didn't have fun since my grandparents left us, the first day we will have a big family meeting in my dad uncle's house , I am eager .
Sunshine ..

A child's suffering ..

It was a tough week for me , I realized how hard it is to have very sick child , specially when you don't have money ..
I heard about a sick boy's story , that touched my heart, I decided to help him in every possible way , because he deserves another chance to live. this is his doctors' report:
"Mohamed Mutaz Abdullah is 13 years old boy with history of C.D.H (congenital dislocation hip ), after birth developed repeated UTI with renal tubular acidosis treated with shole solution( Poly Citra) for 5 years ( since 1995 ) , 2 years later he recovered from his illness but started to develop chronic diarrhea and abdominal distension with loss of weight. , endoscopy and Duodenal biopsy had been done , result suggest Coeliae disease. The boy now is on Gluten free diet with failure to grow and under mineralized teeth with multiple fractures (ectodermal dysplasia)" .
Dr. Rabee Al- Dubuni.-M.B.CH.B. FICMS(Paed).
Dr.hisham Saied Marie –M.B.CH.B.-C.A.B.P.
M.B.CH.B.GP.- Dr.Aladdin N.Altaweel




Mohamed's family had to sell their own house to cover the payments, as you know the hospitals here are in awful situation and the medications aren't available , his parents wanted to take him to Jordan for curing , but their financial condition is so bad..
I met Mohamed today, he is very weak, tiny , and thin , he is not in a good health, he weigh 23 kilogram , and he is only 130 cm tall !!!!!!!.


I am trying to find organizations or someone can help , if you can help in any way , please leave a comment , or E-mail me , my e-mail address is livesstrong92@yahoo.com
His parents will very much appreciate your help , so will I .

I am happy to help this boy ,although I hesitated at first from publishing his story ( pride issue !! ) …
Stay safe ,
Sunshine ..

Short post ...

This week I was so busy , with my homework & quizzes ..
I am doing well at school , the teachers started to know me better , and in English class I always try to look for new words from the dictionary , and now the other girls are trying to do the same , so there is a hard contestant between us .. The history and geography classes became my favorites , because I very much like my teacher but the other girls don't.
The mathematics teacher likes me so much , as well as the French teacher .. Our teachers for this year teach well except the Arabic teacher.
My aunt Rose gave birth to her new daughter on Wednesday at 12:20 am , after uneasy birth , but now she is ok , my grandma arrived Dubai today ..
I couldn't go to school on Wednesday , because there was a sandstorm and as you know I have asthma , I finished my homework at 4:00 pm , and decided to check my E-mails and answer them , as soon as I opened , my computer was attacked by a virus , and it started to send messages to every one listed in my messenger list , some contain bad words !!! .
I couldn’t control the situation, so I called my relative Najma , and I talked with chikitita and Anarki 13 who helped me a lot , but we couldn't do anything , my antivirus program was damaged !!!!!!! and I had to format my computer ….
Live strong ,
Sunshine.

So many events in the last two weeks …

Hello friends
As you know my grandparents visited us tow weeks ago, I spent the most beautiful time ever, we visited our relatives that I didn’t see for almost a year ( as you know we don’t go out often because of the dire situation) .
we also went to the north, my mom’s uncle and his family came with us .we had so much fun and visited a gorgeous cave in Kurdistan called Anishkiy , there we celebrated my mom’s cousin graduation , he graduated from electric engineering collage .
I am so happy that we were allowed to enter Kurdistan , because many times the Kurds don’t allow Arabs to inter their city Dhook , for security reasons.

On Thursday we had a nice breakfast and celebrated my grandma’s birthday in a casino near the Tigris river , I had so much fun in the water motorcycle , and my brother and sister also had a fascinating time , but in the casino I fell down , and hurt my left arm and shoulder badly , I couldn’t use it for a week.

We also took my grandma with us to my mom friend’s Nishan , where I saw one of my school teacher’s there , both of us were from the bride side..
I also was invited to a party in my friend’s house , I arrived after one hour delay, as the roads were locked by US Troops , because of a bombing car , I had so much fun and wonderful time , I took my mom’s musical keyboard with me , we took so many pics ..
I went to school last Sunday , the Arabic teacher was not good , and I didn’t like her , the geography and history teacher was very edgy , but she is good in teaching, the English teacher was so lovely , the mathematics and the rest of the teachers are ok..
The headmistress’s assistant is HORRIBLE , she keep yelling with or without reasons , her name is roses !!! whenever I look at her , my heart start to pant so fast , I feel terrified when I see her , not only me, all the girls even the teachers feel that way , I guess!!.
On Tuesday , I came back from school so tired and slept for 3 hours , I had very bad flu , and when I woke up , my mom took my body temperature , it was high 38.5C , I didn’t go to school in the next day , and I couldn’t fast for two days .
On Thursday my way to school was terrible , all the bridges and roads were locked, and we were stuck in the street for an hour , I didn’t feel comfortable with being near many tanks knowing that someone may attack them in every minute . & I didn’t have a mobile phone to call my worried mom. I lost the hope of arriving school , and thought that I will miss the chemistry quiz , but suddenly our national guards opened the bridge and I arrived school , I was late and missed the first class , I wanted to call my family to tell them that I was ok , but MS.Roses shouted and said “ we don’t have a phone , go “ , a man drove his daughter to school heard her shouting allowed me to use his phone , what a generous man he was !.
**************************************
the situation in my neighborhood isn’t good as usual , we hear many explosions specially at night ( usually mines ), we had three inspections in the same week!!!.
3 days ago , at midnight I was asleep when I heard very loud explosion , I put my head under the pillow , I got fearful awake and my heart was like a drum , the night was very calm and that changed in a sec . I heard the sound of shrapnels falling on the roof . in the next day , my grandma found many shrapnels in the garden , among them a big shrapnel , bigger than a hand palm ..
what baffle me is that who exploded the car at midnight while there is A STROLL BANS?..
The day before yesterday at midnight , I was awaked by a limelight , I put my head under the pillow , and waited to hear the sound of explosion ,( I know that the light speed is faster than the sound in few seconds ), but I kept waiting , and I didn’t hear anything , then I realized that it is a projector light of the police on national guards and not a bombing car !!!.
*********************************
My interview with NHK TV was viewed few days ago , I felt so happy when I checked my inbox , I had 50 letters , most of them were from Japanese , in the next day I sent thanks E-cards to all of them , I hope they enjoyed them..
Anyway , my friends in NHK TV will send me the DVD soon.
Sunshine ..

Good and Bad news ..

The day before yesterday at afternoon I felt so happy when I knew that my grandparents will visit us next week , as you know they live in Baghdad , and we didn’t see them for 8 months because the road to Baghdad is very dangerous and most of the time locked by US troops , and I can’t spend long time in the car in such hot weather because I have asthma , I talked to my grandma few days ago by internet as there is no phone services between us , and I told her about my mom , and how she misses them ,and that she became very frustrated and angry person , in the same day grandpa decided to risk and come to Mosul next week .
We made a good program to them , they will stay only 5 days in Mosul, in the first day they will rest, then in the next day we will visit the uncles and relatives , the next day in the morning we will go to Kurdistan ( YES , I am sooooo excited, we will go to Dhook which is about 30 minutes by car , and we will visit a near by summer resort ) , next morning we will have our breakfast in a Casino near the Tigris river , (I went there few days ago , and took pictures and video to show you ) , then in the next day we will celebrate my grandma’s birthday . please pray that they will arrive Mosul safely and have a comfortable and quick journey.
yesterday my mom and I began to prepare and clean the house , windows and everything , and I wanted to organize my room , it was in a horrible condition ( but now it is organized) , as my room very very hot I didn’t enter it or organize it since 4 months , I have only a fan , and the air-cooler doesn’t work !! ,anyway at 10:30 am while I was cleaning the floor and my mom was organizing the library, heavy shooting began , I told my mom to go downstairs , because there are big windows in our living room, but she replied “ no , just stay away from the windows “ suddenly many near by explosions were heard , without any word, I carried my brother and ran , my mom and sister ran too , we hide downstairs for an hour , the sound of the explosions and shootings were so high , my brother was very scared , he hold my mom so tight , my grandma’s face looked pale, and everyone was tired from the uncomfortable sit !!!! I remembered the old days when we used to hide under the stairs or stand near the corner for 5 and 6 hours , everyone was praying for the policemen, national guards, and the neighbors safety, and that the good guys win the fight against the bad, and that’s what happened , after an hour our policemen and national guards with the help of the US troops who came after an hour with many helicopters defeated the terrorists.
My family members didn’t injure ( thank god ) , but bullets entered the walls and hit a neon ( small losses ) , but a woman and boy were killed when a mortar fall on their house , & the dad was badly injured , in the same time another neighborhood witnessed a fight , 8 citizens were injured , and one man was killed .
We were happy in the day before , then we became upset and scared in the next day, we kept hearing shootings and explosions all the day , my brother couldn’t sleep at night , he was very frightened.
In the same day I was checking my E-mails , and I found an offline message from my grandma says “ yesterday your grandpa went to the market , and while he was shopping, the US soldiers started to walk in the street , they were many , your grandpa asked a soldier gently whether he can depart , and do you know what the soldier answered ? he said “shut up”. ! grandpa turned to another soldier and asked him the same question – son , can I go of please ?- and the soldier replied “ we are leaving, in a moment “.
“ I chatted with grandma I was so angry , that soldier’s attitude ,affected my respect to the military so badly, because the soldiers should represent their country’s ethics and leave a good impression , this bad soldier was so impolite and rude , I told my grandma ( relax grandma , the soldier’s parents didn’t behave him well , that’s in case he has parents , I am sure that he lives in a box under the bridge ,and he is blessed to sleep in a tank ! ) and I still mean what I said , my grandpa is very educated wise respectful man , and he is loved by everyone, , my grandpa is a civil engineer , studied in USA , he traveled round the world because he worked for the “Arab organization for the industrial development” , that soldier SHOULDN’T talk to grandpa like that.
Sunshine .

The 3rd time is the best ...

Hello friends ,
On Thursday I had an interview with NHK TV, that was at 6:00pm , I was so excited and nervous in the same time , the reporters talked to me on Skype ,but guess what ? my microphone didn’t work !!!!!!.
my mom phoned our neighbors to borrow their mic, but they didn’t have any ! I was very upset , I kept trying to make it work , but after an hour I gave up , we postponed the interview to the next day .
my family and some relatives who were in the living room tried to make me feel better. one of my relatives know some words in Japanese ,since he worked with a Japanese phone connections company , he taught me 9 words , then we read some old posts and had a nice evening .
Then at 9 :00 my dad’s cousin brought me his friend’s mic , I felt so relieved .
In the next day , I was happy and anxious to make the interview , at 3:00 pm I called the reporter , he said " we hear you well , we will start now ".
I said " ok , just a sec "I wanted to bring a paper where I wrote the Japanese words.
Then I became ready to start , but the mic didn’t work !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I kept trying and trying, but I couldn’t .
I was so mad , we called some nearby relatives , & neighbors , but we couldn’t get another mic . I was afraid that the reporters were bothered or they will not postponed the interview to another day again .
I cried , but the reporter told me not to feel upset , because Japanese people believe in an aphorism that says " the 3rd time is the best " , I felt so much better when he postponed the interview to Saturday at 6 :00 pm , just then my smile returned to my face .
In the afternoon we visited my mom's friend , then we went to search for new mic , we went to Jamea street ( there are so many shops sell computers and it’s stuff) , but it was Friday , the shops were closed except one , we bought a new mic !
on Saturday , I had the interview and the mic was working good , my mom sat next to me , she was calming me down , I was excited and I talking hasty , I don’t know why the words came out so quickly !..
I had fun , and got new friends too , and it was my first voice interview , hoping that the next interview will be with Dr . phil (as a phenomenon teenager guest !!! heheheh just kidding ) or with Oprah ? who knows !
Yesterday ( Sunday ) , I went to my relatives’ house , my grandma and grandfather stayed in the house , because we expect home inspection as few tanks were in the neighborhood. when we were back my grandma told us what happened in our street ,she said:
“ we saw some tanks , while you were out , the US soldiers locked the ends of our street and inspected some houses , after awhile we heard an explosion, my grandma looked from the window and she saw heavy GREEN smoke , interfere with seeing the next door neighbor !!! “
what did the soldiers do ? what was this smoke ? and why ? no one knows .
what baffles me is that there are 4 houses in the neighborhood being inspected lately from time to time ?????!!!!!!!! .
I don’t know those neighbors , they live at the end of the street, but there must be something behind those continues inspections ?.
Live strong !
Sunshine with love .
The school will start on 20/9/2006 , I will try to write to you every Thursday , and whenever I have time , I should work hard and get high marks , so that I can make you and my family proud ..

My best post is back.

hello , I wrote a post in December but i had to delete it for some reasons , but know I published it again , enjoy it .
Sunshine

About my summer holiday..

Hello friends , I know that I am not writing to you often , but I am very busy with my book, I have many things I want to write about, but we get electricity once a day ! I can work on internet for 60 minutes or less !!!!
The scholastic year will begin on Wednesday 20/9/2006 …that mean three days before Ramadan , I feel hungry already , (Ramadan Kareem to everybody specially Muslims). This year we’ll study religion ( it has 2 books ) , Arabic (4 books) , English ( 2 books , grammar and a novel ) , French , Kurdish , Physics , Chemistry, computer , history , geography , biology , mathematics , art and sport !!!! . if I get in every subject 90% and higher I won’t attend the final exam , that’s wonderful . It’s hard , but I will do my best, and study day and night , I pray and hope that we will have nice teachers this year .
I can’t believe that I finished secondary school ,And I am in the high school! And three years later I will go to collage.
In this summer holiday I think that the best thing that happened is the improvement of my relationship with my father , now we get along so well , we became closer , we talk together , my dad came with me to the computers’ markets!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I wanted to buy my own musical keyboard , and a laptop, but I changed my plans. I bought golden jewelries, because it is more valuable, and I can get my money back in case I sell them at any time I need money , and I am still confused about buying another desktop Computer , musical keyboard or exercise machine ! .
We went only one time to the computers’ market, but it was closed !!! and because of fuel shortage it is hard to go again .
I read "Anne of green gables" but I didn’t finish it yet , and read " here is the answer" and " the history will not start tomorrow" it talks about the Iraq history , it is a political book and very looooooong , but I finished it .
In the beginning of the summer holiday I bought two dictionaries , they are very helpful , Arabic – English and English- Arabic . They help me in my posts too , to find the correct synonyms .
My sister , mother and I made so many handmade work, and spent wonderful time.
My mother go to work almost everyday and leave Mariam and Yosif with me , they always drive me crazy . I usually prepare the breakfast , clean and organize the house so that my mom feel comfortable when she reaches the house .
In this holiday I went to 3 weddings , Nishan and Laylat al henna , I had a nice time , we visit our nearby relatives twice a week .
I couldn’t sleep in my room this summer because it is not safe , and it is tooooo hot , I wake up many times during the night because of the shooting and the hot weather , we can’t sleep in the roof ( as many Iraqis did this summer),it is dangerous because of the explosions’ shrapnels and erratic bullets.


(those are some of the shrapnels and bullets that we found on our roof )

I became very anxious person , I feel worried about my dad and mother , because their way is not safe , they see some times see corpses thrown in their way to work and exploded mines everyday , and I also feel worried about my grandpa while he is in his work , and about my grandparents who live in Baghdad because the situation there is horrible , and the list don’t end .
I have continues headache , I feel worried about everything , specially my family safety and my school , how can I go to school with the absence of fuel and security ? my school is very far , and the way is dangerous .
But beside that I think it was good , I made so many achievements .
Mother Jones magazine made an interview with me the next interview will be with NHK TV o soon …
Take care ,
Sunshine .

My news summary....

Hi all , my computer didn’t work and I had to leave it in my relative’s house for couple days to fix the problem.
At that time I stayed with my grandma’s sister . She had a minor surgery and needed someone to take care of her , she has only one daughter and she is in her honeymoon , so I spent two days with her .
After that I went to laylat al henna for some friend , I had so much fun , as they are Kurds , I dressed clothes similar to theirs ( chiffon and satin with so many colors and beads , and of course many golden jewelries ) , they danced Dabkah (my favorite kind of dance) , I had a nice time .
After that in 2 days I went to my neighbor’s wedding , it was hot but I had fun .
In the mornings , I teach my next door neighbor how to use computer and internet , even if we don’t have electricity , because they have large generator.
I spend the afternoon making handmade work , and I am learning how to play on my mom’s musical keyboard, I didn’t buy one for my own yet , because we don’t have fuel to go to the market .
I have continues headache these days, maybe because there are so many things in my mind that make me worried .
Those are my update news ,
Sunshine…

New swimming pool ...

Hello friends,
in the absence of security , fuel , and electricity , we always try to do something fun to kill the time . We have a small swimming pool, where Mariam and Yosif spend most of the day time in. I really like to swim with them, but it is very small, about 150 cm in diameter!!!! Today the temperature was 50 C , I felt sooo hot .while my sister and brother were swimming, I put my feet in the water and then started to walk saying " I wish I fell down in water " my mom and sis surrounded me and wetted me with water , Yosif said " please honey , swim with us " Yosif and I swam , then he felt bored and left the pool ,but I remained in it and had my lunch their, while all the family sat beside the pool. It is great to have lunch inside water , we sat in the garden at 2 : 00 pm , because the temperature out side is much cooler than inside the house !!!!!.
Then my sister and I caught the flexible hose and started to chase each other , the funniest thing is that my grandpa came from work and we wetted him with water , he started to laugh and said "stop , there's money in my pocket ,my mobile phone , and important papers " but it was too late .
Mama saw how much we had fun , and she told daddy when he came home that she want to buy us a bigger swimming pool from a near by shop , he said " ok , I'll pray the afternoon prayer then go and buy one ".
At 6:00 pm mama and daddy came with a very big swimming pool , I was so happy , I spent the greatest afternoon ever , I didn't have fun like that long time ago , daddy , mama , grandpa , sister , brother and I swam together , and played many water games . I had marvelous time with my family especially with my father, our relationship is much better (we didn't fight since June).
I spent one of the best days in my life.
Sunshine.
(Thank you my government for giving me the opportunity to spend more time with my family !)………….

Iraqis are mollycoddles !!!

Do you know that our government spoils us very much?.
You must be wondering how!!!
Well, in summer our caring beloved government does not give us electricity to allow us have free Sauna!!! They want us to be slim, to be fit and healthy.

The government doesn't offer fuel to the generators to reduce the pollution in the air! And to protect us from the generators noises, they want us to sleep well so as to wake up in the next morning to be CODDLED MORE.
The government doesn't offer fuel for the cars, in order to lessen pollution and car accidents. In this way they make us do walking sport, to work and school, I even had to walk from the hospital gate to the emergency room, when I was sick. walking is very useful and healthy sport as you know..
The government doesn't control the situation, but impose stroll bans during the night and sometimes during the day, because they want us to spend more time with our families and hence improve our relationships. The government make us leave our homes and neighborhoods (when the situations get worse) to allow us visit our relatives and spend few days with them.

The government doesn't make a strong and serious plan to catch the terrorists who kidnap Iraqis, because our lovely government wants us to live real adventures!!
The government doesn't give us passports easily, because they don't want us to spend our money randomly in a foreign country.
The government doesn't offer electricity for our heaters in winter, to make us feel like we live in Alaska while we are in our homes.
The government doesn't offer oil for our Sopas (kind of heaters in Iraq work by oil) because they want us to breathe fresh air.

The government doesn't offer gas for the cookers, because they care about our health, they want us to eat fresh food, fruit and vegetable, and to avoid fires that occur because of gas leak.
The government doesn't offer medicines to hospitals, because they want us to use the herbs, it is better than medicines and don't contain poisons!!
The government lies (I couldn't find the wisdom behind that, probably because of my young age, but I trust my government's good judgment).
The government doesn't stop this chaos , because they want us to experience new things all the time such as mines , bombing cars , bombing animals as donkeys (once the terrorists bombed a donkey in a market) , bombing human beings!!!! , and if someone died because the explosion, it is ok , we should believe that it 's his/her destiny , and of course they would APPRECIATE that ,because they might go to heaven or to hell (and even hell is better than Iraq ).
The government coerces the girls to wear scarfs and Abayas, to revive our folklore that is why some politicians wear (turbans and Dishdasha).
The government steals money, to improve the economy! But I can not understand how!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
The government doesn't offer jobs for it's citizens , because WE ARE SPOILED.
In the past Iraq was unknown country, but now we became famous as we became the first line news, so we became spoiled and famous at the same time.
the government doesn't spoil it self, how? In the other hand
They have electricity all the time, to sleep well, and wake up astir early, to serve the Iraqi people and spoil them of course.
They get very high salaries to pay high TAXES!!!!
I know that we live like that for a wise purpose, but I wish we can make a Life – Swap with our beloved government.
MY EXQUISITE GOVERNMENT I WISH I CAN SPOIL YOU, JUST IN THE WAY YOU DO TO ME. MOAAAAAAAAAA

Does your governments spoil you like that ? I am sure 1000000000% that my government is extraordinary.
Now, my biggest fear is that you feel jealous.
When my mom call grandma and tell her "I can't bear this life anymore" my grandma replay "you must, may be god is TESTING us, to see our faith and ability to bear ". Once my mom replied "OK, BUT, I WANT TO GRADUATE MA"….!!!

The Spoiled citizen, Sunshine

Cloudy days .....

The circumstances that we (the Iraqis) live in, makes us expecting bad news at any time, or something bad will happen soon, even me!!! I never imagined myself as a pessimist, but the hard conditions make me act in a different way.
And whenever the phone rings, my heart beats hard, particularly at night after I hear bad news all day long. Especially in these days as the situation is getting worst here.
Few days ago, I was working on computer when my mom returned from her work, she was coming up the stairs, and I heard her uncle's name and kidnappers ..?! I left the computer promptly, and went to see what was going on.
17 well-armed terrorists wanted to kidnap uncle M , thank god he wasn't at work at that time( he work in a pharmacy as an assistant) , I wonder what did they want , money ?! he is not rich!! .The bad guys banged the pharmacist( a pregnant woman) as well as her husband to make them admit where uncle M was , and they also banged a man in the street waiting for his wife who was in the ultrasound clinic, because his descriptions were similar to uncle , the terrorists did not know uncle M in person, a passing by friend heard what happened and warned uncle , who left the house immediately with his family..
I was very worried about them , he has 6 children and wife , his financial condition is not good , that's why he work in two jobs from 6 am till the stroll bans ( at 9:30 pm)although he has serious heart problems, , but he has a supportive loving family .
we called him , he sounded horrified, but he said they were in a safe place , the terrorists in somehow got his mobile phone No, phoned him ,threatened him and extorted him for money , as he didn't have that money my grandpa assured him that all the family would pay for him " we will bring you the money even if we must sell our cars, & our houses, there is nothing more important than your safety , don't think about money at all , the money will be in your hands as soon as possible ".
I was really worried about our safety specially my grandpa and father, some times the terrorists kidnap the relatives of their prey too…
Whenever the phone rings , we stand still, , it is too hard to live in a country with the absence of security, you live in paradise guys .
After few days from this bad shocking news, my dad's phone rang at 11:30 pm, he got a message "call on this number now". My dad said
"should I call or just ignore the message?" my mom and I said " CALL " we didn't say anything for few seconds, and many horrible stories and thoughts came to my mind at that time, it was the longest 10 seconds in my life, the phone rang , and someone was shouting "CALL THE NUMBER THAT WAS MENTIONED IN THE MESSAGE NOW " and he shot the phone.
Dad made the call from the kitchen.

When he came back, my mom and I asked quickly "WHAT?"
He said " it is just the guard from work, he couldn't operate the generator and he wanted me to call him so that he won't loose money"..
I got mad, I thought they are kidnapers or bad guys "Idiot , stupid guard what would happen if he lost 9 cents " I said .
And I started to laugh as well as mama and we told each other about our thoughts at that time.
My thoughts were: (how much money will they ask for , should we sell the cars , or our golden jewelry , do we have that much of money , what if they will hurt my dad , what will happen if they want too much money that we can't offer, of course my grandparents will pay with us too. )
My mom' thoughts were: someone died or kidnapped, problems in work, what does this person want?"…
Oh , all the Iraqis need psychological counselor , and to spend the rest of their live in a resort as well ,
Sunshine.

Eight days in Sunshine's life .

Hello friends , I wrote my diary for Eight days ,
Friday 21/7/2006
9:00 am : I woke up after I spent one of the worst summer nights, hot weather with no electricity at all , with many nightmares , oh….. my mood is really terrible , and I am very nervous ( I become nervous when I don't sleep well )…..
9:30 am: I had my breakfast and I'm more relaxed now , my father's uncle just arrived my house , he visits us every Friday morning .
10:00 my relative just left, we were talking about the fuel and the high prices (normal Iraqi talk !!)
11:40 am : my dad and I cleaned the house , because my mom had an asthma attack ,it is the first time I see my dad doing the house cleaning the way he catch the mop is so funny! I have electricity now so I'll go and read my E-mails .
11:50 am : I hear shooting , there is something wrong in my neighborhood today!!….
21:10 pm: the electricity is off now , I had 20 mails, I'll go to read Anne of green gables book now , while listing to Radio Sawa .
12:40 pm: there is a heavy shooting again, it is the second time today.
1:20 pm : my friend H ( 16 years old ) phoned me , she invited me to her house at 6 pm, we are not in the same school , and we didn't see each other for 5 months , I am so excited , she will borrow some books from me ( a bullet in the head , the ghost , a murder in the airplane , the silent witness , & Asmahan and the British intelligence ) , I shall also teach her how to make macramé and to spin with beads , and she will teach me the appliqué.
3:30 pm: I had my lunch and drunk a delicious Iraqi tea I started to tell jokes to kill the time and make my family more relaxed during the absence of the electricity, and now I will go back to my book.
5:00 pm : I finished reading now , and I am going to prepare and change my clothes , I'm so excited .
6:00 pm : ready to go .
8:20 pm :I just came back and had lots of fun we talked a lot , the funniest thing that they had guests and their house is too small ( 2 bedrooms and one guestroom and a living room , they are 10 people in the house ,my friend sleep in the living room with her 2 brothers and 2 sisters , her mom and dad in a room and the other one is for her married brother , his wife and 2 daughters !!!) their financial condition is not good although there are 1 dentist , 2 doctors , 2 teachers , the other two boys work though they are studying in collages , they work in a shop as sellers .
" B" my friend's sister-in-low felt sorry for us , so that she allowed us to go to her room.
"B" lost her uncle , 2 cousins and her uncles wife last week in a bombing car , god bless their souls .
10:00 pm : I feel bored we don't have electricity , I am writing under torch's light , I'll join my family in the garden now .
Saturday 22/7/2006.
10:40 am , I wake up an hour ago , organized the house and beds , prepared the breakfast , and I'll start my day in reading .
12:30 pm : my mom came back from her work , and I have electricity now , WOW .
1:30 pm , the power is off , I wrote a post and published it , I also published some pictures .
2:00 pm : I had my lunch , I am thinking about my exams' results , I am nervous and worried but anxious in the same time .
2:10 pm: My father's uncle phoned us, he said that a car was bombed near their house, they are all ok, but there windows were broken and many chops were fallen in their garden .
3:00 pm : my mom and I were trying to find names for Rose's child, I found 8 till now..
10:00 pm , I wasn't in a good mood to write , I had three hours electricity , and I wasted 2 hours trying to publish pictures but I couldn't , I had sooooo slow services , which drove me crazy and I started to cry at the end , I had many mixed feelings, I was worried about my results, upset ,& angry from the internet company , my mom took me out from the house to some nearby relatives', I played a game " Fighting game " to feel better , their son tough me how to play basketball and it's rules , we caught butterflies from their garden….
I don't have electricity so I will spend the evening in the garden ..
Sunday 23/7/2006
10:00 pm : I woke up an hour ago , my mom didn't go to work , she went to apply a request for MSc study, I sent to her prof( he is also a family friend) a present , it's a copy of my assay for the contest of the American Islamic congress that I participated in , he felt so happy , our internet company sent an engineer to fix the internet problem we have .
3:00 pm: Najma's mom invited us to there house tomorrow and I am afraid that my dad won't be able to get us fuel (as it is not available and is very expensive in the black market), ….
3:30 pm: I am reading I'll finish the book tomorrow
5:30 pm : I stopped reading now , ready to go to my relative's house ..
10:00 pm : I went to my relative house , we did some shopping , I came back 2 hours ago , and watched Dr. Phil show, I had my supper while working on computer , I published a new post, read and replied many E-mails , I also typed my diary for the past three days , I hope the generator's operator will give us power , I want to see " Brat camp " he doesn’t give us power during the night at all , and only few hours during the day with very low voltage that I can't even work on computer .
I saw in TV an announcement says that our results are tomorrow, I can't wait.
11:30 my relative just phoned she got my marks, wow; I am the first one in Mosul who knows her results!!!! , my marks are good I have one mark not very good (85 in physics ), and I got 96 in Arabic , I can't believe it I thought I'll get 85 !!!!!!! , I am happy my par is 94 % and it's good for my hard circumstances , the hot weather and the absence of electricity, I got 91 in Geography and History , although I couldn't study history when I was in the emergency room and my mom read the geography for me , I'll go to sleep with so much relief.
Monday 24/7/2006
11:00 pm : I woke up an hour ago , my brother kept jumping over my bed I feel mad as I still feel sleepy ,I couldn't sleep because of the hot night.
When I opened my eyes my grandma was there and said:
-" I called the headmistress"
-"Yes?! "
- "your friend's par is higher than yours "..
-" I am ok with my par"
- "when" S" was in your age, 3 years ago, her par was higher ……"
- " so what?! , I don't care , at all "
Then I left the room and took a shower.
I know I didn't get the highest par , but I studied well and was happy in my par , but now , I am confused , and upset
2:30 pm : tears didn't leave my eyes , I'd never been sad and pessimistic the way I feel right now ,
my mom came back from her work feeling so happy she bought Pepsi for the doctors , workers and patients too!!!! For my success , hehehe , and when she saw me she said " I was expecting seeing you jumping and dancing , 94 % is not a low par , it is very high , you should be proud , don't care about what your father and grandma says , if you took 99% they would say why not 100% ?"
I felt better after that conversation, and from now and then I shall be proud of my par ..
3:00 pm , I checked my E-mails, I had 24 mail from my readers telling me that they can't wait till I publish my marks , I was so happy to read that .
8:00 pm: I just came back from Najma's house and I had fun with her, Hnk, and their friend Z. we talked a lot, and had grate time,
11:30 pm : I didn't have power , so I spent the afternoon in the garden ..
Tuesday 25/7/2006
12:00 pm : I woke up 3 hours ago , cleaned and organized the house , we are excepting guests today, I am so excited .
2:00 pm : I'm going to read now .
5:00 pm , I finished the first book of Anne of green gables series , and now I'll go to change my clothes and my brother's .
6:00 pm : my relatives will arrive in a couple of minutes, I can't wait.
8:30 pm : my relatives just left the house , we had fun together , first we were talking about their daughter marriage (will be on 3/8/2006 ), the party , cake , wedding dress etc , I had fun , then we started to talk about fuel , electricity , security , kidnapping , killing , etc , as I always say it's the ordinary Iraqi talk !!!!
12:00 pm: sorry for not covering my diary, but I didn't have electricity , and I spent the time in the garden .
Wednesday 26/7/2006
6:00 am , I AM MAD , I woke up because it is hot and we don't have electricity , I'm very sleepy , and nervous , I slept for 4 hours only. Why should I spend the night with out even a fan, while the electricity minister sleeps comfortably with his air-conditioner on?!!!!
1:30 pm : at 9:30 am I heard my brother Yosif , crying so I went trying to put him in bed , but I slept in his bed!!!!! And he woke up, I woke up again at 11:30, Yosif and I played in our small pool, and had a great time.
5:00 pm : I slept in the time between 3-5 and now I'll go to change my clothes and prepare the house , my relatives will come after 1 hour .
When I woke up , my mom told me that my neighbor " A" was kidnapped , I got shocked , and couldn't believe that , why would someone kidnap him ? he is not political , he don’t work with the US troops nor any political association , he is not a doctor nor an engineer nor a Pharmacist ,as they are reasons to be kidnapped in my country!!! , "A" is an ordinary and loved guy , all the neighbors love him , his father died and he take care of his 26 brothers ,sisters , his nephews and nieces , and his very old sick mom , she has heart attack , hypertension , and diabetes ." A" is a 38 years old father of 3 children (5, 9, 11), I pray that the kidnapers will free him soon .
8:30 pm : my relatives just left the house , I had a nice time , their son(24 years old ) borrowed 2 books from me ( country come-up and country come-down , and a very old book explain the English grammar) , and I showed him most of my books , he liked them , he knows that I like to read but it is the first time he sees my lovely library , we also talked about one of my favorite books " the body language ", (it's an amazing book, I read it more than 4 times ) , about Helen Killer , Jane Aer and many books .
It is really nice to find someone share you the same interests.
12:30 am; the kidnapers send SMS message saying " he is with us and fine . Do not call the police " .. Now I will go to sleep .
Thursday 27/7/2006
10:00 am : I woke up and had my breakfast , my mom switch on our generator , we don't do that often , because we have no fuel , I will work on internet , answer my E-mails , and type my diary, I didn't type my diary for the last 3 days we didn't have electricity .
12:00 pm : my mom finished working on computer at 10:30 and then It was my turn, I had many letters , I read them . I wrote ,sent 6 letters , and typed my diary, my mom is calling me , there's a nice show , she said , and I don't know what to choose computer or the nice show ?!.
12:30 pm : I saw a gorgeous show today , called " grease mania" , oh , I would love to go for one time in my life to a show like that , I love those kind of shows , I like the circuses , panoramas , any show contain music , dancing , & singing .
I just see them in TV, my mom is lucky she traveled when she was a kid to Denmark and to west Germany , she saw a real play city , zoo , beach, and things I can't even imagine , It is my dream to go out side Iraq , and may be visit Disney !!!!!! , will it be possible?? I am not very sure.
2:00 pm : I'll go to read now .
6:00 pm : I read for a while then called my friend "R" ( she lost 2 uncles , 2 cousins , her aunt's husband , and her father ), R took the highest mark in the class , I am so happy for her , now my mom , dad , Yosif will go to the photography , then to a library , my grandpa and Mariam went to our relative's house , and I am staying home with my grandma ..
8:00 pm : Good news , I am looking through the window , my neighbor just freed , my grandpa was in the street and saw him in the car , "A" stopped the car and hugged my grandpa , all the neighbors , his brothers , nephews, family , and son are running in the street , his brothers are crying (tears of happiness) , and his son is carrying a balloon , they are hugging him , it's very emotional view , and I am so happy .
at 7 : pm my mom went to their house , they told her that A was with his brothers , friends , and son when he was kidnapped , all of the men sprawled on the floor while the terrorists pointed their guns toward them,, except his 10 years old son , A's partner cough him form his arm trying to stop this kid from running to free his dad , he wasn't thinking about the guns nor the terrorists , he was shooting at them to leave his dad , thank god the terrorists didn't kill him , ( I heard that a 14 years old guy shot the terrorist in order to save his dad , the terrorists killed his dad and throw him in the street ) those terrorists are heartless.
12:00 I didn't have electricity so I went to the garden, we heard a loud explosion behind my house, and we ran to the house , I can smell the fume ( a lorry burned because of a mine ) , I can't breath well the house smells Smokey .
Friday 28/7/2006
12:00 pm : I woke up at 9 am , had my breakfast as fast as I could , we had electricity, I worked on computer for an hour and half , then the power was off , so I cleaned the house with Mama, organized and cleaned my room , and now I am in the living room with the family
02:00 pm , I was searching in my grandparents' library , and I found a dictionary , wonderful one ( English-English ) , I thought all of those books are about engineering , but I was wrong . No one touched those books for years, they are old and dusty .
I took a peace of clothes and started to clean them ( to read the books' names ) , my grandma told me to take any book I like , I took many ( here is the answer / learn Turkish / the Jewish's mores / & the stars , people , and the atom ). I am so happy.
4:00 I am typing my diary, now, and will go to my relative's house.
8:30 , I came back from my relative's house , their daughter finished the sixth class, but her par is 76 % , so they were so upset.. My mom went to our neighbor's house , to congratulate them for A's safety , and I went to the garden with the rest of the family , we played with water , then we heard a VERY heavy near by shooting , and ran to the house , I was going to fall down as there was water on the floor , but my grandpa caught me , as I hit the door , but I am alive with simple bruises in my arm and back, our electricity is good , we had power for three hours , Yes , I can't believe that .
11:00 I saw a fantastic show on TV 5 (it's a French channel) and I kept saying, "do you want me to translate what they are talking about ??!!" Hehehehe
I had fun , I wish I can go to a show like that , one day ..
I found my relative online , I'd never met him ,he is in my age , and I had so much fun , I asked him about his family, life , & school , it is the first time I talk to him , I don't remember him when he was in Iraq , he went to Oman when he was 5 I guess , but he remembers me , I am so grateful for the internet ..
1:30 am , we had an awful sandstorm , and my asthma is bad , I can't take a breath , I'll go to sleep now , I am so excited my relative's wedding is next Thursday, and my other relative's wedding is so soon too .
It is the last day of my diary , I had so much fun and felt like a reporter, although I was very upset and worried about my exams this week, but I hope you'll enjoy my diary .
Sunshine

My results .....

Hello friends, the electricity is so bad that is why I can’t write to you often.
I took my results , and my par is 94% , I was happy , my mom , her parents and my father's dad are so happy and proud , but my father and his mother didn't like my marks , specially my grandma , she kept saying " you should work harder " " you didn't study well " etc .
That made me so upset , but my mom , relatives ,and some friends talked to me ,and I returned back my confidence , and now I am happy and proud for what I've done , specially I was sick and in the emergency room …
Anyway, here are my marks :
Religion: 97 %
Arabic: 96 %
English 97% (I was excepting a full mark)
Mathematics: 93 (well, I was shocked, I don't know in which question I made a mistake ).
Biology: 92%
Chemistry: 99%
Geography and history : 91% ( I could take 100 if I wasn't in the emergency room, I couldn't study , so I think 91 % is pretty good for those circumstances , don't you agree ?)
Physics: 85 % (I did my best)
French , my family told me to expound an objection , because I am sure that my mark can't be less than 90 % , but I won't !!! there is no need for that , I took 86 %.
Sunshine

BTW, I want to publish my first book , do you know a publisher? If you know please E-mail me on livesstrong92@yahoo.com or leave a comment, I'll appreciate your help very much.

Update ..

Hello all ,
I'll get my exams' results tomorrow , i am so worried and nervous .I am reading Anne of green gables , and doing handworks in my holiday , & I had an interview lately with mother jones .. I hope you will like those pictures for our garden ..



I planted this tree myself when i was a kid
Sunshine .

Our garden .......

Hello friends,
In spring and autumn when the whether is nice, we spend most of the day time in our garden, and in summer we spend our evenings in it specialy when we don't have electricity, we spray water to cool the weather, we even spray each other and irrigate the plants.
While my grandparents talk about Ayam Zama (the old days when they were young , and tell how life was good at that time , they had electricity and fun in their lives , they also talk about the old traditions in Iraq in general and specifically in Mosul).
I always thank god that we have a garden to kill the time, my grandma and grandpa take care of it.
Two years ago when a brimstone factory had been burned many trees died , but we planted new trees.
We have many orange trees, in winter all the family co-operate , dad and grandparents pick them off , my sister and I put them in baskets , and mama watch us (hehehe) , we also allocate some for the relatives , it is really fun , and the oranges in our trees are very sweet and yummy .
I like the garden that's why I want you to share those pics with me

(I'll publish the other pictures later )

Sunshine ..

Iraqi weddings ....

Hello friends, as I promised you in my previous post to write about the wedding's traditions here in the Arab land in general and specifically in Iraq.
Every country has it is own traditions and it is important to be enlightened about them before we judge.
I wanted to write about that because many people think that we have the arranged weddings, the kind that the guy sees his bride in their wedding day! I got a letter from a reader asking me if it is true, that was in the past 100 years ago.
Our weddings are similar to the others' except that we have more parties.
Every wedding starts with the engagement, the guy see a girl , then if they like each other, he asks for her hand (in other words to get marry) , she might be a relative , neighbor , cousin , they might be work mates, or students in the same collage etc . First he goes with his parents to hers, and tells them his desire to ask their daughter to get marry, (if the girl's father is dead, he should go to her eldest uncle).
The parents ask about the guy whether he is good, polite, co-operative, etc, in his work place or his collage, and they also ask about his family reputation.
Then after the agreement there is a tradition we call " Mashaya" in which the men ( specially the most solemn men) from both families get the chance to meet each other , to get the good impression about each other, you see the lineage of the family is very important here..

When the girl says "Yes", they buy the engagement rings, a golden one for the girl and a silvery or platinum one for the guy.

Then the engagement party (Khitooba) is the coming step, in this party the girl and the guy's close family members are usually invited, (the parents, sisters, brothers, uncles, aunts and cousins). In this party they wear the rings, the fiancé also bring a golden gift to his fiancée, dinner will be served , music as DJ or a band is very important to celebrate this important event.
During the engagement time they begin to know each other more and more , and of course, they start shopping for their new house .
In these days, as the life is very expensive, it is not easy for the young men to buy a house, that is why they may live in his parents' house, they may build an apartment in the garden or as a second floor apartment.
Shopping includes buying clothes, jewelries, make-up stuffs, perfumes, the wedding "Nishan" and "Laylit al henna" party's dresses, they also look for house's necessities & furnishers ).
After that there is another party called " Nishan ", where the traditions are so much fun .
Anyway , the bride wear many dresses ( long time ago in Mosul the bride used to wear 7 dresses , but now they wear 3-5 depend on their financial condition , I didn't know that till my friend talked about her sister's Nishan and how they follow the old traditions and bought seven dresses , red , blue , off-white , black, yellow ,and purple I don't know what is the seventh colour ) , both families and the fiancé adduce golden jewels to the bride ,now days the life become more expensive that's why some bride's family comprehend the groom's financial condition , and not incommode him to bring much , only few grams , but there are still some families ask for very much gold, specially the Kurds , who adduce kilos of gold to the bride!!.
As they may make a heavy golden belt to her.
Nishan is like all the parties , there is music , dancing , then dinner , my mom's Nishan started at 10 pm till 2 am !! But now because of the stroll bans and the very bad situation, the Nishan party starts at 3 pm till 6!!!! In spite of the very hot weather , it's SUMMER for god sake.
What can people do ?
My relative "Noor" want to have her Nishan party in a celebration arena, because their house is too small , but they can't , it is not safe . My grandma told her that she is welcome to have her party in our large garden.
(Two years ago, we had Nishan party for my dad's cousin in our garden, I was the DG girl, I have many music CDs and it was a beautiful Nishan party).
Anyway after Nishan or before it there is al-Qiran, it is the lawful wedding.
In Qiran, the judge joins the two bridegrooms to be a husband and wife.
After the Qiran union, the new couple allocates candies in special cups to everybody they know, neighbors, relatives, friends, colleagues etc, to inform them about their union.
A night before the wedding day, there is "Lailat Al-henna" party in this day; one of their relatives put the privet in the newlywed's pinkie or palm. Some relatives may like to have privet in their hands too.
The bride's mother, aunt, or anyone close prepare the Henna's salver, they put green plant we call it" ace " , it really smells good, henna (means the privet) , and some candles , I love the salver's view . (The Shiite has different tradition in Qiran and lailat al henna, they put the seven whites, I wrote a post about that once).
Lilat al Henna is a small party , just like the engagement party , just for the new couple ,their parents , brothers and sisters , close friends and some time uncles and aunts .
After the Lailit al Henna the Wedding day comes (finally , huh ? ) ,it is just like yours , the bride wear her white dress , and the groom his new suit .they either bring a real band or DJ .the two couples dance as well as their friends and relatives, they make Dabka( special dance in my country) , then cake ceremony comes next, and in most of the weddings the bride get jewelries from her family , her husband and his family and from some close friends. Then dinner is served too.
After that the honey-moon starts, as there are no hotels in the last three years, they spend their honey moon in their apartment, or if they have money they go to the north or our side Iraq.
There is another party after the wedding called the Fourth-day (Arb3t Ayam) in Mosul ,and the seven-days (Sab3t Ayam) in Baghdad , it is not necessarily after four days nor seven days ,some times they make it after two weeks or a month .
In this party the bride dress her wedding dress and many other new dresses or her Nishan dresses, in this party, the guests bring the gifts.
Now we are done.
My friend "J" talked about her relative's wedding party:
"I went to D's house 2 days before her wedding day , to help them , in the wedding day , we went to a nearby salon in the morning , when a heavy shooting began , the bride was nervous, ,then we thanked god the shooting stopped , I didn't have my hair done , we wanted to got home as fast as we can , anyway we went to the house and D was about to cry , my mom and sister arrived , after they spent 2 hours stuck in the roads! we didn't tell D at all , the groom and his family didn't came at the exact time , we called them and they said that they were trying to find an open road , they couldn't because the neighborhood was sat dawn by the US troops , they found an open road before the stroll bans in about 30 minutes !! ( few months ago the situation was really bad that is why the stroll bans was at 8 pm) , we postponed the wedding for a week, imagine the bride's condition !! she kept crying all night long ".
in my country, the bride not just worry about her cloths and make-up only, she worry about the groom arrival in the exact time ( a life ) as well!!!. .
Sunshine.

I could bear it all !

Hello friends, hope you are ok .
It had been very long time since I updated , as you know I had 40 days to study , and about 3 weeks examinations , it was awful , hot weather 46 C. , no electricity , no fuel for the generator, studying in hell would be better !!! .
*****************************
The 40 days :
I used to wake up at 07:00 , and study till the bed time , in mathematics I had the most horrible days, we didn't study the last chapters in school, there wasn't enough time ( because of the days we couldn't reach school and the blocked roads and the bad situation in general) , those chapters were about geometry , I spent 9 days , studying , thinking & sleeping with math!!!!.
I studied all of the subjects carefully , and made many precises , I did my best , no TV, ( except Dr. Phil when I had time ) , I did not leave the house only very few times.
Night bruxism got worst , I still complain from painful spasm in my tempromandibular joint( I got this term from my mom, hehehehe) , I put the night guard but it seems that it doesn't work with me, the doctor said it's because of stress .
********************************
The examinations:
every day , before I go to school , I listen to music ( if we have electricity )or looking for music on the radio , music makes me more relax .
The first day I was really worried , the new driver didn't come early , which made my parents mad , he drives badly & sooooooooooooo speedy , I kept saying "WATCH OUT , THIS CAR , THAT CAR ! " , I arrived school safely, with no accidents!!!.
I saw women (the kind you see in TV.) sitting on the ground, they brought their rugs, children, Cola & food with them to the school! I turned to my friends saying "I think we are in the wrong place, we are in the village"
Then it appears that they were the home-schooling girls with their families, we have a nice garden in our school, so it is a great place to have a picnic, I guess !!!
At 09:00 The ring rang , we went to the classrooms , my desk was near the window , without curtains , my face became like a tomato during the exam , and I could see the sweat fell on the paper , we are not allowed to bring water inside the classrooms , but in Baghdad , they are allowed to bring water , and mobiles, WHY ? !!.
After few minutes the exam started, I finished after 40 minutes!! With the best answers, and waited the driver who came at 11:00!.
The body- guard in my school is very rude man, he made us wait our drivers in the street, under the burning sun, my friend fainted, and most of us felt nausea.
I arrived the house exhausted , I took a shower , had my lunch , and took a nap , then studied the literature ( one of the Arabic books we study in school) , and studied the grammar the days after it .
The second exam :
I went to school very optimistic, but when I took the questions' paper, I had the biggest shock!!!!!!!!!!!
One of the questions was about a poem that we didn't study in school , I felt really upset , I answered all the questions except this one .
Why would some one ask us to write a poem not from the curriculum? In our book there are many many poems, and the questioner didn't find one except this!!! That is ridicules.
The rest of the exams were not bad, I did well.
Everyday when I come home, I chamfer a day; it makes me feel happy and relieved!

**********************************
On Tuesday, I had an asthma attack. And stayed-up till 1 am, on the respiratory-machine, I woke up in the next day a little bit dizzy, and tired but even though I went to school , and answered well.

Wednesday at noon, I was not capable of breathing, the doctor gave me many many medicaments, that made my hands shaken and my heart beat so fast.
I woke up on Thursday feeling much worst, I used the respiratory-machine all day long, my heart was like the drums , I couldn't study , I couldn't see through the respirator mask , I put some pillows under my arms , but it didn’t work, my mom had to give me hydrocortisone shot .I thought I'll be ok and I asked my mom to take Mariam and Yosif and go for a ride so that I can study well in a quite house. But I was totally wrong!
when they came back ,my face was bluish , mama called her uncle ,he 's a doctor , he suggested to take me to the emergency room .but my parents were worried about the stroll bans.
Anyway, we went to the hospital, we parked the car away from the hospital ( security reasons !!!) And we went to the emergency room walking!! , we waited for a doctor , but no one came !! then my dad brought a nurse who tried to insert the canula in my vein , but he couldn't , he tried many times and now my arm is blue ! mama brought me the oxgenator . I saw the most horrible things, a woman who had a heart attack, her two daughters were running here and there trying to find a doctor for her , the old woman was in pain , and no doctor came !! we see in TV. The doctors are kind, caring, doing their best trying to save people' life .No word can describe what I am feeling now .
There was only one nurse running her and there helping people in the emergency room, he put the canula for me, from the first attempt.
I started feeling better after an hour , the nurse gave me 2 shots , dad saw one of my grandpa's friends , with his sons , he had angina , & his sons carried him to the hospital , they were searching for a doctor too .
The good nurse (god bless him ) ran , and said "we need blood " there were two guys from the national guards who were badly injured , my parents were worried , terrorists may attack the hospital with the existence of the national guards , it happened many times.
Among the most horrible cases I saw, and I will never forget it
A couple of worried parents caring their daughter , she was in my age , they put her in a bed beside mine , the dad was shouting " her heart stopped , she stopped breathing too ".
No , the doctors didn't come running , the nurse did , " we need oxygen here , bring one " he said. There were only two oxygen bottles…
I was looking at her crying mom , I just can't imagine her fears and feelings , I randomly took-off my mask , and gave it to her , after a sec , the nurse said " no , we should put her on the DC . " it was very scary , mama and dad , kept saying " do not look , look at the other side " but I couldn't, the girl returned to life , then a doctor came , "toooooooooooooooooo late mister!"
I kept saying to my mom " please mama , go and help that man " ," look there some one need help", "can you please help that patient too" I was worried about everyone.
I felt a little bit better , my parents and I left the hospital , but my thoughts were still there .
I wished I were able to help , the doctors were so careless , while they should be the most caring . It wasn't the first bad experience with the emergency room , once I was really sick , a doctor we know was working in that hospital, he put the canula in a wrong way , my hand started to swell , and his friend came talking to another doctor –
-" you won't believe what happened to me "
- "what: "
"I gave a 15 years old boy the wrong medicine, I did not think he had a heart problem, I thought he is too young for that".
- "what happened to him?"
- "he died !".
he said it with no sadness .
I came to the house at 10:00 pm, but I needed a doctor at 11:00, and the stroll bans started at 10:00!! A doctor live nearby, checked me out.
My grandpa sent me from Baghdad medication for asthma (it was prescribed previously by my doctor) , but it is a rare and expensive one in Iraq.
Thank god , I became better and I didn't need it ,a relative doctor ,who is a great person care about patients which is something we don't find usually in our hospitals , felt so happy when we told him that we will donate that life saving medicine to the hospital .
******************
The days of my sickness preceded the history and geography exams( together) , I couldn't study , but mama read the whole geography book for me ( thanks mama , I wouldn't answer without your help )
On the next day , I was breathing better, but the medications made me so tired and shaky. But I did very well.
Mama came with me to school and brought with her the respiratory machine ( just in case), at that day the bridges were blocked and we arrived late ,that made us more and more bothered.
*********************
on Wednesday I came back from my final exam French , I did well too.
I am expecting a full mark in math , and from 90-100 in the rest of the exams , except physics , and Arabic , I'll get my results in the middle of July , I am a bit nervous , but excited in the same time .
**************************
My plans for the holiday:
I'll buy a laptop (inshallah ) I have been saving money for a long time , and I am planning to buy a musical keyboard too , I love playing music , & I am also planning to learn more handmade work , of course writing to you ( whenever we have electricity ) , and answering tens of E-mails , my friend Bill Smith sent me books " Anne of green gables " with the help of my dear friend Madcanuck who sent wonderful music CDs , I'll read them in the holiday , while listening to the music .
*******************
Five of my relatives will get marry in the summer holiday, so I'll have lots of fun , and will have a "new look "!! .
Speaking about wedding, I do not think you know the traditions here. I am thinking about writing a post about that.
Excited Sunshine with tomato face.
PS. I apologize I couldn't reply many readers back , I didn't have time , I'll answer your E-mails whenever I have time , promise .

I am alive but busy !

Hello friends
Oh , 9 days left , then my exams will start , I finished all the subjects , except religion , 10/6 is the big day .
I will have a day off between the exams (to study ).
Religion is the first exam , then Arabic , English , mathematics , biology , chemistry , history and geography (in the same day ) , physics , and French .
I studied well , but I am still very worried , I did my best , but I can't be sure that I will get the highest marks , my mom told me to do my best and do not care about the marks ..
I didn't have time to check my E-mails for 10 days!!!
The house surround isn't very quiet , my brother , sister , & my grandparents' loud voices (they can't hear well unless they shout ) sometimes I just can't concentrate, from ten I can give 7 !.
I will write to you after the exams, about my plans for the holiday (I have many posts ideas), keep waiting and wish me good luck , a safe and open roads , and electricity (the weather is so hot , and the electricity is so bad ) !! I'll need that.
My summer holiday will start on 29/6 .
Sunshine.
Btw , I can't believe that I'll be in the high school , I heard that next year we will study Kurdish !! I am excited.

Emotional story ...

Hello friends , My mom published this post on her blog , it is very emotional story . Stories like this makes me more determined to help the people in the villages , because they do need help.

Hello
Last day I arrived my work an hour and a half late because of the very crowded road near the gate's check point …
An old woman and 10 years old boy with school bag on his back were waiting for me.
I treated the old lady first, and then asked the boy to get in. He was pale & shaking. He sat on the dental chair and pointed inside his mouth, and said "this is very painful".
I looked and saw nothing, I knew he was confused and pointed to the wrong side; I looked to the opposite side and saw a badly carious tooth.
I told him that we need to extract this tooth, he shake his head for approval.
"But we need to have the approval from some one older than you my dear" I said. "Any one from your family as your parents, older brother or sister, aunt, uncle, or even a neighbor ".I added.

He stepped from the chair in an attempt to leave, with his eyes full of tears, and said nothing.
-"Are you coming back with someone later? I asked.
-"no, I have no one".
-"With whom do you live?".
-"With my younger brother, he is Mongolian".
-I grip his shaky hands and took him to the patio, and asked him to look around, to the other functionaries; (they live in the same village), and asked him if he knew any one?.
Few minutes later he pointed to a man, he was one of the servants" H".
I sent for" H", and told him that I need some one of Salih' relatives because his tooth need to be extracted. He said "I am his fathers' cousin, I can stay with him because he has no One close…his older brother who was taking care of him was murdered 3 days ago"…
-why?
- He was a policeman…
-"Are you hungry, did you have your breakfast honey?" I asked Salih trying so hard to hold my tears.( I had to ask because he was pale and he could show symptoms of hypoglycemia if he was hungry, he could faint too after dental treatment).
- " no I did not , the neighbors did not bring us any". he said.
Just then I could not hold my tears any more, I took his little hands and took him to buy him something to eat.
-"let us buy something to eat, I am hungry too" ..
-" no, I will go home" said Salih pointing to a far cottage..
- I will take him to my place, bring him something to eat, and be right back"…said" H".
But the boy ran away….
I sat in my room, wondering how could these children survive. How could they live alone, what do they do in the darkness every day? Where is our government, are they aware about that policeman's family….
I can't imagine my daughter Mariam (she is 8 now) go alone to a dental clinic to extract her tooth ….it's scary for a child to face that alone.
After about an hour the boy came back with "H", he ate in his house and came seeking for treatment, I was so happy to see him again, I wanted to give him a big hug, but he was behaving like a man.. He sat silently, I gave him his shot, he was shivering, but was very quiet.
I told him he will not feel any thing he will be anesthetized, he nod his head, I extracted his tooth, and then he went without any word…..

Sunshine